Jake Sez

Musings of Jake the Sprocker

Diary of a Sprocker by Jake Wilson - Age 5

A blog written mainly in Sprockerish or sometimes translated into English

Saturday 2nd July 2016 - In the original Sprockish

Hello Sprockets Jake here.

HELP!!!!!!!!!!! I fink I is cursed.

Every time I goes out when I comez back somefink haz happenz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It start wiv me goes to work an when I comez back Jack one of da Hoominz next door haz built a post-Modernist industrial art installation ( I haz to look diz up on da google) all round our house. It haz metal poles an postz wiv wooden plankz. There are so many polez how iz one sprocker supposed to peepee on dem all I don’t know. (Hoodad here, it is scaffolding in readiness for our house being rendered, not an art installation I think Jake is watching too much tv to come up with ideas like that).

Den I goes to work an come back all da trees in da neighbours garden at da bottom of my garden haz been pinched. I was so shocked I haz to run an bark at da empty space. Baby da cat iz livid az they have deprive her of potential victimz az da birdies not have treez to play in no more so less chance of her getting Freddie kruger on da birdies. I iz traumatized by it an if I haz a snooze (Hoodad here which he does a lot) I forgetz da treez has gone an when I wakez I have to go bark at da space again, I fink I need counselling. Baby iz so angry she keepz sit in da garden an stares at da neighbourz house, I fink she iz plot her revenge!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But da straw dat broke da Jakie back waz when we got home from da manorway walk diz morning. There waz men in me garden and dey waz nicking da fence. Well I went full guard dog an bark an bark. But hoodad just put me inside and went to talk to dem, I fink hoodad may have scared dem a bit as he waz at least double their size.But day haz promised to tidy up an make our side look nice so datz a good fing.

So you can see why I is worried.

Today we iz go on trip to see my norvern Hoogran and Hoograndad and I iz excited coz we haz planned dis for a while an I not seen dem since chrimbo only on skype, but I iz scared what will happen while I iz away.

It iz very weird being excited and scared at da same time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sprock on Puppies, Luvz Jake xx


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