Diary of a Sprocker by Jake Wilson - Age 4½
A blog written mainly in Sprockerish or sometimes translated into English
Saturday 21st November 2015 - In the original Sprockish
Hello Sprockets Jake here.I haz had a strange week.
Sunday was get da Jakey clean day den da hoomins went out in da evening and leftz me. It waz well good I gotz to have many zedz on da sofa. When dey got back dey smelt of catz. I just hope dey iz not finking of bringing any more home! Monday was far from a duvet day, da builders were here banging and crashing about. I did manage to get a few zedz in coz I haz da sleepin skillz. Tuesday hoodad chopped off my waggy tail. (hoomum here: Jake managed to get lots of dead thistle heads stuck in his tail and despite spending almost an hour trying to tease them out they were stuck firm. So we cut off the feathers on his tail, not his actual tail) Wednesday hoodad was up in da middle of da night and went off in the silver comfy. He said he was going to work, but in da middle of da night . . . very suspicious. In da morning, hoomum took me for walkies den hoograndad arrived to help the builders. Den best of all hoodad came home but I had go to work. No hoodad dat night so only da road walk wiv hoomum.Thursday I finally found out what haz been going. Hoomum told me dat hoodad was not coming home for a week because my hoograndad was in hospital and my hoogran wasn’t well and he was looking after her at her home in Rothwell.
Friday would have been a fantasic duvet day as dere waz no builders but hoomum spent all day hoovering and cleaning up da mess da builders had made when dey took down part of da ceiling. Everyfing was dusty andz I waz sneezin lotz. Da only way to avoid da dust and noise waz to sleep so I tried my best.
Saturday; wow waz da wind blowing and da rain coming down diz morning. Dere waz no way I wanted to go out in dat so I ptended to be asleep. It worked till bout 10 but den I needed to pee, I mean really, really needed to pee. I signalled to hoomum to let me out and ran just outside da door to da builders wheeliebarra and peed for ages.
I tried to look very tired so dat hoomum would not take me out again but dat plan failed. She dragged me in da wind and rain but at least I gotz to run free on da Manorway and see a chocco lab who had a big trail of slobber from hiz lip. I triedz to tell him but he just tried to rubz it on me! But I iz Jake, super slobber dodger.
Back home now wiv my towel and hoping dere will be no more walkiez today.
Dats all for dis week.
Pic 1 – How much dust?
Pic 2 – Waiting for the inevitable
Pic 3 – Don’t make me go out again
Stay warm and Sprock on Puppiez Luvz Jake xx
Clickz on da image to see full pic
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