Diary of a Sprocker by Jake Wilson - Age 4½
A blog written mainly in Sprockerish or sometimes translated into English
Saturday 6th February 2016 - In the original Sprockish
Hello sprockets, Jake here.
Well Hoodad gotz back from da ruby wiv Hoouncle Martin all safe an soundz. I fink dey iz getz old coz he no smellz of da Irish wine and waz not stinky parpy. I hearz him tellz Hoomum dey went home an had coffee, diz iz unheard of dey is usually beer monsterz together.
Hoodad waz off wiv da workz fingy again for a couple of nightz so Hoomum waz on walkiez duty. She does getz up well earliez when itz her morning walk turnz. She say it coz her hair takez agez to dry, we all know Hoodad usez da squeegee on hiz baldy bit so he getz da longer lie in. When Hoomum in cg=harge I usually getz da road walk restz but diz week we meetz Bella da beautiful black pug doggie and her Hoomum so da walk da Manorway an I waz made to perform trickz an play wiv Bella, don’t mind really coz Bella iz well cute, If only I had love spudz, *sigh*
In casez any of you iz wonder Baby da Catz won da Hoodaddiez home parpy contest, OMD she curlz one out in da poopy tray dat made even her eyez waterz. I came third butz getz special prize for burpz of da night wiv a massive loud an long after I scoffz me dinner quickz.
Hoomum waz in my bad bookz briefly coz she left da sexy black ballfrow in da carz. Diz meanz Hoodad usez da back ballfrower.
I haz two big probz wiv backup ballfrower. One itz blue not sexy black like me earz an two it tiny. In Hoodad handz it look like hiz Icecream goblin rod. (Hoodad here, yet again Jake is prone to exaggerate I eat icecream with a tea spoon not a shovel as he would lead you to believe and I never hear him complain when I share the left overs.)
Look at pic 1 tiny and spoon like yuk, pic 2 iz me trying to look not interestz at da crappy back up ballfrower but it not lastz co dey iz tennis ballz an I not resistz dem.
Da biggest problmz wiv backup ballfrower iz dey not go so far, a good fing you might fink. But no it not. Hoodad iz much more sneaky wiv da small one an changez ball directionz at last minute an meanz I chase roundz lots more an not getz long restz between frowz, so I waz well pouffed outz. I haz to resortz to runz well into da distance to getz rest see me in pic 3 if you can.
Well datz all folk I iz off to snooze an looks like I may getz an alldayer coz da Hoominz ic cleanz da garage now da builderz is gone.
Don’t forgetz to support your team in da rugby diz weekend.
I iz learn da wordz
Swingz Lowz Sweet Chariotz
Comin to Bring me da Bone
So I singz wiv Hoodad Laterz.
Sprock on Puppiez, luvz Jake xx
Clickz on da image to see full pic
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