Diary of a Sprocker by Jake Wilson - Age 4½
A blog written mainly in Sprockerish or sometimes translated into English
Saturday 24th October 2015 - In the original Sprockish
Hello Sprockets Jake here.
OMD (Oh My Dog if youz forgetz da txt speak) funny fing happened diz week! HooUncle Ish pinches da table an chairz from da eat da good food away from Jake cat toilet room. It waz still dark and it waz Hoouncle Ish so I no barkz or nuffink but whenz I go haz a peek dey iz all gone, I pointz it outs to da Hoodad when he comez down for walkies but hew tellz me to stop beingz daft and outz we go. He not blink da eye dat da stuffz iz gone!!!!!!!!!!
( Hoodad here Ish did not steal the furniture he kindly has taken them to his lock up whilst the building work is going on. Secondly it was from the dinning room not the cats toilet, we have to put her litter trays in there to give her some privacy otherwise gutlord Jake tries for scoobie snax hot off the press if you get my meaning, I apologise if you are eating reading this but Jake is prone to putting his own spin on events as we all know. As for his not barking this was due to him snoring through all the tooing and froing and not even batting an eyelid)
Work is still goez on for da keep Jakie clean room so dere has been lotz of stuff and people on da good side I iz seez my Hoograndad almost every day diz week as he iz housesitz while me and Hoomum iz at workz.
Da new boiler iz in an fingz iz well toasty now. Even Hoodad iz getz in on da messez up duvet day act. He waz home all day on duvet Friday and yes you guessed it I no getz much of a duvet day. As he not go to da workz we haz da longer walkz in da morningz den all dayz I iz protect dem from da builderz and da plumberz by jumpz an barkz at dem. ( Hoodad again I had a day off to sort things out not to ruin his duvet day and we know that when we went out the lazy little sod slept the day away because Barry the Builder told us.)
Den to further ruinz da duvet day he take me on a bonus ball frow, but it supposed to be duvet day. We did see my lickle friend Truffle, she is anuvver beauty, don’t tell me French bird Lucie I saidz dat. Pic one iz da snapz of me an Truffles playing on da Manorway.
Wiv all da workz I getz da muddy feetz but da Hoominz iz torture me by makez me do da twistz on da mat to wipez my feet so I iz getz extra workoutz at da end of walkiez it not fair.
Even da builderz iz torture me, dey haz put pipez in what will be da keep Jakie clean room to remindz me dat da good stank dayz iz soon to be overz.
Diz morning we haz even more torture Ballfrow startz in da dark!!!!!!!!!!!!! What iz Hoodad on it waz so early we waz back before we usually leavez to start. Look at pic 2 it iz so dark dat da only fing of me you can see iz da flashing collar. It so dark Hoodad only frowz one ball an make me bring it back to himz. He was frow it well far so I notz seez it an haz to use me sniffer to findz it. I only likez to use me sniffer to find scoobie snax so havez to use it to findz da tennis ball waz hard workz an well tiring. I waz howeverz good to Hoodad coz I curlz da first present out under a street light so he could see it and pressie number 2 I waitz till it light before dropping it, it only fair as he iz getz on a bit now an hiz eyez not what dey were. (Hoodad here thanks Jake, I think?)
Datz all for today
Sprock on Puppiez Luvz Jake xx
Clickz on da image to see full pic
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